Welcome one and all to Creepy Cove Community Church, the only horror themed church on the planet (as far as we know).
This is the FULL SERVICE...if you just want the 'sermon/ talk' then check out the SERMON ONLY version next to this one.
Rupert Donk opens tonight's service with some words of extreme caution regarding the dangerous peak on which the church stands. Then we have a special impromptu guest called Ash Williams, who we saw running out of the forest, holding a chainsaw and a shotgun. What on earth could the young scamp have been up to? A party for the youth, we should imagine. Though one wonders if there might be a more sinister reason for the blood on his clothes and chin.
Next, Annabelle, the little haunted doll, delivers our Bible Reading, then Peter hops up to the microphone to share some thoughts on 'Dealing with Rejection'.
There's a vaguely 'Five Nights at Freddies' meditation after that and then a prayer. Until the service is closed with Ash himself, who offers to sing a smooth bossa nova called 'How Could I Have Known (A Love Song For Linda after I Chopped her Head Off by Ash from The Evil Dead). What a convoluted title, ey?
Finally, Peter and Rupert talk about the humble Garibaldi biscuit brand...then it's the end of the service.
Thanks for listening. If you appreciate the *crazy hard work it takes to make this FREE show* then please consider joining our Patreon. You'll get various extras and help us keep Creepy Cove going. Thank you!